This trend is making a comeback and we’re jumping on the train!
When we tell people were gonna be surprised the reaction is about 50/50 from people. Either they are so excited and totally agree with the waiting, or we get the, “what! There’s no way I could do that!”
Throughout the years, I always went back and forth on what I wanted to do the first time I had a baby. I saw a lot of my friends have cute gender reveal parties, gender themed baby showers, and I thought that looked awesome. And cheers to those who did or are planning on finding out! But there was always something in me that wondered what it would be like to be surprised.
When we found out we were pregnant, I knew immediately this is what I wanted. And it took several weeks of convincing from me and others to get David on board. David says either way this child is gonna learn to shoot, so now he’s ok to wait!
Here’s some of the reasons why we’re waiting.
1. There’s really no surprises left in life anymore. This is one of the biggest surprises in life that you have no control over. I think there’s something special in the beauty of that. In our world today, we have immediate access to information 24/7. It’s almost impossible to be patient and wait. This is one of the good things in life that forces you to give up control. It allows you to be ok with not knowing everything, and forces you into patience which I’ve heard is a good thing for parenting!
2. When we got pregnant, we weren’t hoping for a specific gender. I know a lot of people do. But when people would ask David or I early on what we’d like, we would say just a healthy baby! That hasn’t changed. So whether we have a boy or a girl, we’ll be overfilled with Joy no matter what!
3. Theres something that inspires me from women of old. I know I know, I’m thinking opposite than most modern women today. But, to think that women have been giving birth naturally and without a gender reveal for hundreds of years is pretty cool. It wasn’t until the 1970’s that they were using ultrasounds in America. I’ve considered myself a bit of an old soul, so I just love the idea of kicking it old school with all the women who have inspired me and connecting to this sacred mystery of childbirth.
4. I’ve heard that it really helps first time moms get through labor, especially if you’re hoping for a natural childbirth like me. I mean it makes since. Other than a baby at the end, it’s something even more exciting to look forward to with each push. A good motivation to keep going!
5. I’ve also heard from friends that people tend to gift you with useful/reusable items rather than the cutesy gender specific stuff. Don’t get me wrong this baby will have cute stuff which we’ll probably go out and get after with gift cards. But can I get an amen that green & yellow, neutrals, and black and white is way cuter than baby pink and powder blue.
I’ve heard so many stories of people getting cute outfits and their child can only wear it for a couple weeks because they’ve grown out of it. What’s wrong with gifting after baby anyway? They need very little things in these first few weeks, so if someone wants to get us a girl/boy outfit after, even better! Also, since we’re moving to DC 3 months after baby, and overseas a few months after that, we don’t want a lot of stuff. Our apartment can’t really hold it at the moment. We aren’t even setting up a nursery until we get to Africa, and we want to keep things pretty minimal while there as well. So as a heads up amazon gift cards and stuff from our Amazon registry is greatly appreciated!! We’re going minimalistic over here in the Silva house!
6. For me personally I wanted these 9 months to be a time for me growing closer to the Lord. I wanted to use this time to prepare me to be a Godly mom. After the baby gets here, it’s all about baby everyone says. So I want to make sure that these 9 months are for me going deeper into God’s word, being intentional in my marriage, and loving those around me even harder. I had a feeling that if I knew gender of Mocha Bean, I would be completely obsessed with shopping for clothes, decorating, and getting everything ready, as if the baby is going to notice! Whatever your religion, not finding out is an act of faith. It’s about having faith that everything will work out and you’re going to love whatever comes out!
7. There’s something a little more personal to me in keeping things a surprise. Obviously we’re excited to introduce our little one to the world. However I have noticed with my friends who decided to keep things a surprise I was almost more excited to reach out to them to find out how they and baby are doing. Now 99% of the time we just read about it on social media, click like and move on. We want people to meet our child with David’s eyes or my personality, not just girl A or boy B, and actually connect with us in person, not just through an app.
So although I’ve kinda ripped on social media and gifting things just know that we are still gonna share on social media when baby arrives. We will also still accept whatever gifts you give us! Although just know they may/probably will get donated while we’re in Africa if we don’t end up using it. We can’t wait for our little bean to get here and for you to meet our sweet babe!
For those who do decide to find out, I totally get it. I still think about it sometimes, and that would bring its own excitement and our momma’s making gender specific quilts. If you do decide to wait, I’m right there with you! And there’s hundreds of other parents who can say the same thing even though it might feel like you’re on your own.